Tales of the Cocktail Announce Thrilling Prospect of Virtual Festival This September

At least the Spirited Awards judges have an excuse for not visiting all the venues this year



In a world buffeted by forces of constant chaotic change, even small moments of consistency provide comfort. For example, Tales of the Cocktail are still using MS Paint and Clipart to create their branding. I mean, look at that flier. It’s a classic 90’s Wisconsin neighbourhood-watch group Yahoo Geocities design. I find Tales’ reliably shitty graphic design familiar, soothing. Dependable.

Similarly predictable, and rubbish, is the news that Tales of the Cocktail (TOTC) will be a virtual event in 2021. Not their fault of course, but it does preclude the only good thing about Tales of the Cocktail, namely eating and drinking in  New Orleans. Instead we have the now-familiar programme of virtual presentations and seminars, all accessible from a website hub, which takes the place of drinking Bud Light in the Monteleone’s revolving bar until the brand person who paid for your flight makes you go to the seminar they are sponsoring.

Speaking of seminars, you can submit your idea for a session here.

The TOTC sessions will be free to bar industry professionals and cocktail enthusiasts alike. Ticket registration doesn’t appear to be live as yet, however you can register for updates on the TOTC website. Should you do so, you can look forward to a discussion programme themed around ‘community’, which will serve as “a rallying cry for communing thought leadership to drive future advancement“, whatever the fuck that means.

The Spirited Awards will take place in 2021, and we’ll be sure to let you know when the nomination process has opened with another sarcastic story the moment the poorly designed press release hits our inbox.

Tales of the Cocktail: September 20th – 23rd, 2021