Koko Kanu Miami Vice Competition Results


When Miami Vice first hit our TV screens in 1984, it seemed to most Brits to have been beamed in from another world.

Marco and electronic friend...
Marco and electronic friend…

Flair-wearing Dads were spellbound by deeply tanned skin and perky bikini bodies. Mums in hair curlers were flustered by deep-V shirts and sun-oiled muscles, and I imagine our constabulary wanted to know how the fuck a couple of cops managed to drive round in a Ferrari Testarossa.

Me? It was shoes with no socks. A pastel silk suit, with a vest top underneath, and shoes with no socks seemed to 11-year-old me to be the least masculine outfit a person could wear while fighting crime. But what the hell did I know. A few years later, my white River Island suit jacket sleeves were rolled up past my elbows like everyone else’s.

River Island probably saw a jump in pastel suit jacket sales last month, and iTunes analysts are no doubt wondering what caused a brief spike in Jan Hammer downloads too. The answer, of course, was the Koko Kanu Miami Vice comp.

Bartenders were invited to buddy up with a partner and create two recipes – a Piña Colada twist and their take on a Miami Vice. The brief was simple: this is an old school rum comp, so bring your chat and entertain the crowd. The prize for the winning team would be a Miami Vice day that includes a driving a Ferrari, a night out suitable for Crocket and Tubbs, but hopefully no dead hookers.

The Reynolds Brothers...
The Reynolds Brothers…

When the competitors and an impressive number of spectators descended on Loves Company for the comp, they were welcomed by a spread of home-made jerk chicken (courtesy of Samantha Burke), which is something that all cocktail competitions would do well to emulate. Punch was drunk, a couple of fortifying shots downed, and then it was time to kick off.

It was interesting to see how ‘old school rum comp’ was interpreted as a brief.

It occurred to BarLifeUK that some of the competitors were so young, and so used to comps being ‘shirt and tie, World Class / Legacy’ affairs that they didn’t know what that implied, as a few of the first teams up were a bit… well behaved.

This didn’t last long however and soon, cellophane-wrapped bundles of what we assume was sugar were being speared with knives which were then licked and the contents confirmed to be ‘good shit’, in true drug bust style.

Winners Maxwell Whitney and Keivan Nemati.
Winners Maxwell Whitney and Keivan Nemati.

The team from LAB were missing a bartender so they made do with a manikin with an iPad as a face, displaying a photo of the man down. Jan Hammer and a slow-mo walk in greeted the boys from Loves Company, who then punctuated their performance with long, homo-erotic stares at each other, which was uncannily similar to my Mum’s favourite episode of Miami Vice.

The Reynolds brothers put on an awesome show that very nearly won them the prize, and once Joshua’s knees give out and he no-longer wants to bartend, there is undoubtedly a career waiting from him on a film set.

But for sheer performance giggles and a damn tasty Miami Vice, served in one of those helmets that have two drinks holders and straws attached (the perfect serving vessel for a Miami Vice, if you think about it), first place went to Maxwell Whitney and Keivan Nemati from Zetter Townhouse.

Congratulations boys, Miami PD would be proud and we hope you enjoy your Miami Vice day out.

Winning drinks specs

Maxwell Whitney & Keivan Nemati – Zetter Townhouse

Custard Colada

  • 50ml Koko Kanu
  • 100ml pineapple custard
  • 130g ice

Hands free Miami Vice – Served in a helmet holder with two attached straws.

Combination of Custard Colada and strawberry daiquiri:

  • 50ml Appleton
  • 20ml lime juice 20ml strawberry puree 10ml of almond butter syrup 130g ice

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