That's MR Potato Head to you...

I was joyfully walking the streets of Seminyak in Bali on a warm January evening, when a stranger approached and asked me if I knew a Tom Collins. Strange, I though to myself, but was quick to reply: “No, I’ve never met anyone named Tom Collins before. Why do you ask?”

“Well Sir, he’s hopping from bar to bar and he’s been singing a mighty bad tune about you”

“I’ll murder him”

“Quick! Down the end of that road, you’ll find Potato Head Bar, he’s gone in there, Sir” was his instruction.

Fortunately for me, I was meeting a couple old friends at Potato Head that very evening, so it was going to work out great. Give this douche a dressing down then have a drink to relax and de-brief, post throttling.

I began my journey down a magnificent entrance, a driveway fit for a king, flanked by palm trees 15 metres tall.  I drew up my sleeves and marched on down. This Tom Collins was in for a kickin’, I thought, as I drew closer but slowly, I felt my rage subside. This golf club-esque approach had a profound calming effect on all who walked the length.

I rounded the last corner and was greeted by a structure akin to a football stadium and waiting to greet me was another sizeable structure in the shape of a doorman. I had my backpack with me and I was to hand it over for a quick scan, just a note pad

and laptop, so was given the nod. I was then given probably the most thorough pat down I’ve had since being in Asia. Most days, I’m frisked at shopping malls, hotels etc. and it seriously makes me laugh, as it’s generally a hand on the small of your back.

That’s why I choose to keep my gun in the front of my trousers, the security never check there and the added convenience, I never, ever forget to put the safety on. Alas, I wasn’t carrying my weapon that night.

In I went and I was guided between two walls adorned in recycled window shutters, anyone that has seen this bar could tell you what a fantastic way this is to colour and decorate a blank canvas of grey concrete. From a distance it’s has a rich texture courtesy of the horizontal slats, also the colour and texture transform depending on your perspective. Interestingly it’s taken ……to complete with shutters, sourced from all over the island.

Next, I was greeted by a gorgeous host who struggled with the concept of East, West, North and South, but by god did she try. Given her looks she was promptly forgiven and I made myself comfortable at a table I was shown to, nearly forgetting why I was there. Aaah, Tom Collins.

I thought the best way to track him down was through one of the servers, if he was shooting his mouth like my friend in the street told me he was, surely one of the staff could help me locate Tom Collins.

I waited for some time, which gave me time to take in the surroundings.This bar was truly a grand design, not only was it huge, there were several levels at least two bars, formal dining area, a sizeable lawn for dancing when resident and international DJ’s played and they even had a pool that nestled between grass and the sand of Seminyak beach.

This place was the perfect environment to help you forget about your day to day, much like Mahiki or Milk and Honey.

The first bar’s lamp-shades had maritime horns, possibly taken from a one-time sea-going vessel, possibly not. A back bar that had a live creeper vine spanning the length of the 6 metre bar. Standing room only. And it seemed like there was a dress and attitude code there too, Bin-Tang vests and loud, obnoxious voices. Unfortunately, you can’t escape certain things.

The next bar along was decorated with white garden chairs at a low height with the bar tenders on a lowered floor, so that eye-level service was maintained, a very nice touch, something I feel you don’t see often enough.

Around this time I noticed my friends come in and I signaled them over. I still hadn’t seen a waiter/ress (sexist!) but I’m sure they weren’t far away. We made our acquaintances and I remarked on my friends new boat shoes, perfect venue to be sporting the new purchase.

We sat down and were finally greeted by one of the staff. He asked if he could be of assistance I asked if he knew a Tom Collins and he said he’d ask at the bar. One step closer, was I!! My friends reminded me that a mutual friend had arranged a bottle of Ketel One for us to enjoy. Colin Chia, thanks again buddy, you’re a gentleman, thanks for being a part of this great night. We sorted this out along with soda and lime to boot. It was great settling into and enjoying the surrounds and we did talk about the venue, the décor and the menu for quite sometime. Proof they had done a great job.

The menu was great, plenty of choice a varied selection of Potato Head creations and yes, there was some spelling and grammatical errors, but this bar review isn’t about pointing out every mistake and shouting about it from the top of the hill, I just want to share experience and enjoyment to others in the industry.

Our drinks came over and I had a glass presented to me “your Tom Collins, Sir”

Tall, some fizz and adorned with a citrus garnish, this guy knew what I liked but what the flip was going on. Was I set up? Who is this Tom Collins and whose parents would name their son after a cocktail? No wonder he ‘bad mouths’ others, he’s angry at life this guy.

I set my lips down on the drink and took that first sip. Magic, this drink had the makings of something great, good gin ‘punchiness’, fantastically balanced and refreshing to the end. I, like most bartenders have a relationship with those classics that comprise of base spirit, citrus and sugar. Daiquiris, sours, Collins etc. They’re a great way to test the waters of a new venue and can be turned out at just about any bar.

We settled into our groove for the evening and watched people come and go. The friends I was with knew this place well and frequented PH whenever they were in town. I enjoyed everything about the evening, great company, comfortable and varied surrounds, a great cocktail and a beach for flips sake.

In conclusion, Potato Head is a great place, well worth checking out. Go, go, go! Bali, thankfully, is experiencing somewhat of a comeback on the tourist circuit and I know I’ll visit again. During my time in Bali, I visited PH twice and even saw 2012 in with friends. And it must be said, they make a cracking Gin Rickey.

It’s difficult to put a complete introduction together that communicates the entire event, and does it the justice deserved, so I’ll just get right in and tell my tale of the 5 day event.

Daniel Estremadoyro and I

I was named as one of the bar captains for the week, which meant overseeing one of the 6 bars that hosted a different challenge for all 32 competitors. We were to run the bar, host the competitors, look after our esteemed judges and for me I was to liaise with the kitchen as I was captain of the Asian Food Matching Challenge.

The judge I was paired with was Daniel Estremadoyro, owner of The Real McCoy Bar in Cordoba, Argentina. Daniel is one cool dude, he was so kind to the competitors, helping keep the nerves at bay and basically being the judge we’d all like to have on the other side of the mahogany when being scrutinized on technique, taste, imagination and interpretation.

Day 1 Welcome Party

After a few weeks of preparation, making liqueurs, redistilling vodkas and training support staff, the first day was finally here. I strolled out of my accommodation and down the stairs to my waiting taxi, manned by Tahir, a gentle fellow of little English. From the rear view mirror he could see the anxiety in my eyes and sped me through the busy streets of Delhi to the Imperial hotel, where preparation for 1000’s of welcoming cocktails was to be done. Tahir had taken the speedy route to the hotel, avoiding a legendary set of traffic lights, where motorists and agitated ginger Australians can be known to wait for up to 8 minutes.

Ridiculous. Although, when we came to one of the sets of lights on our particular route, Tahir took a knock on the window from a portly motorcyclist who had stolen a plastic Ferrari helmet, from one of his children, explain something in Hindi. We pulled over and Tahir inspected the rear corner of the car and then opened the boot. This meant only one thing. I got out the car and despite our language barrier, Tahir and I set to work on changing the flat tyre like a couple of Jenson Buttons pit dudes replacing his softs with hards.

I was on the jack and Tahir was on the nuts, hahaha, and between us I think we set a new record. Tahir even knew the order in which to tighten a 5-stud wheel pattern. It would’ve annoyed the shit out of me being in the back of a car that hadn’t had a tyre replaced correctly.

I arrived at the hotel and was blown away by the marquee that housed the 6 challenge bars, an entertainment bar, stage and grand floor with a lotus flower inspired couch at the centre. The builders had done so much work and they were clearly knackered. So cream crackered, I would find them sleeping in the most obscure places and occasionally, I’d find 2 or even 3 of them spooning. Far less homophobic than the builders I’ve ever worked with.

The captains, Amanda Wan, Angus Zou, Tim Etherington-Judge, Rohan Carvalho, Adi Ruiz and I set to getting our challenge bars up to speed and getting the main bar organized for the first night. Having all the captains together for the first time was great, we knew we had a crazy week in front of us, but led by Tim E-J who, not once took his eye off the summit and kept us climbing throughout.

Guests arrived, cocktails were supped, announcements were made and a large, warm Delhi welcome was given. The following day would be the start of the competition seeing the Bartenders through each challenge to whittle them down to regional winners and then of course the Global World Class winner who would be taking the mantle from Erik Lorincz. Who was going to take the crown? You already know, I’m sure.

Unnecessary comments/jokes about my height tally: 7…a good first day.

Day 2 First Day of competition

Preparing for the pairing

It had started; there was a major buzz in the air. In fact I hadn’t seen this much excitement for cocktails since I was making them for my cousin Greta Wohlstadt and her crazy, crazy pals, Eliza, Sophie, Jill and Lauren earlier this year. If you see this quintet of exquisiteness high heeling around Adelaide, keep your distance. It’s for your own safety.

The first morning was a little shaky for some and embarrassing for others. For starters, I wasn’t dressed like the rest of the captains, but I maintain that I was told, that for the challenges it was traditional Indian garmenting. Lucky for me, my red face blended in rather well with the outfit. At my bar food was served, on time I might add, and paired cocktails were dreamt up. The idea, as you could most likely imagine was to create 2 cocktails to compliment or contrast 2 of the 6 canapés on offer.

The first contestant was Olivier Jacobs of Belgium, my god did he set the standard high. Presentation, eloquence and a damn sharp outfit made this guy one to watch, my stand out for the first session.

The afternoon session saw the next batch of contestants through where I was to meet with Raconteur Bar legend and UK representative Jamie MacDonald. My money was firmly on him from day 1. A great performance by the wee lad, a cool presentation peppered with sharp wit and a pair of blue suede shoes that unfortunately couldn’t be judged by the aforementioned Dan Estremadoyro. All this gave me further hope for Jamie take the overall prize. Wish I jotted down what he made that afternoon. Aye.

Unnecessary comments/jokes about my height tally: we only had another 3 today, taking it to a total of 10.

Day 3 Half day of competitions and the Johnnie Walker Blue Label new bottle launch.

Today was slightly more relaxed in terms of amount of bartenders through my camp as we had just the morning session to get through. It was however the most testing in terms of organizing everything around the bartenders and the kitchen. Dress rehearsal, yesterday, anybody? Heinz from Austria stood up and made a rather large impression on me that day, an impression to match his mighty European frame.

Speaking of large European men, I also met Torsten Spuhn for the first time, the German representative. He had a list of requirements for his day of competition (tomorrow) and given his reputation, I wondered just how long and obscure this list could be. I was also wondering why, the day before he had even tried the food, he knew what he needed for this particular challenge. Did Torsten have the secret police working for him? Possibly so, rumour had it that Torsten exceeded his baggage limit by some 70kilograms. You put 2 and 2 together, that’s all I’m saying.

The latter half of the day was all about Johnnie Walker Blue Label; literally the whole place was turned blue through the afternoon, in earnest of the Global Launch of the new bottle shape and design. Spooning with your colleagues just wasn’t an option that day, so much had to be done before ‘curtains up’ Bitters needed decanting into atomizers, some 1600+ serves of Whisky needed to be poured and most surfaces needed to be painted or lit in some shade of blue.

Two fine gents from Purl Bar, London had been called upon to come up with some memorable serves for the evening. One such serve was a simple lashing of Johnnie Walker Blue in a wine glass set in a traditional Scottish quaiche. Inside the quaiche was a Scottish fog, fuelled by crumbles of dry ice, bringing the sweet, aromatic fog to life for a visual appeal like no other. Then the Blue Label Launch invitee was able to select from a range of reputed bitters and some purpose made bitters.

This was a popular way to get the party simmering and one that will cement the night in guests’ memories for a long time to come. A Big Blue Label thank you goes out to Tristan and Tom from Purl for working that afternoon and helping to make it a smooth evening for all.

Unnecessary comments/jokes about my height tally: 15, getting back up to speed.

Day 4 Halfway through the challenges and the forsaken Bar Safari

So, challenges were becoming second nature to myself and to the kitchen and today was a squeaky clean act, something I tried to create every day, so as to put the competitors at ease. Ensuring good performances could be recorded on the judging sheets. The only hiccup today was the loss of our dear German friend, Torsten Spuhn. I wasn’t sure how a man of such huge stature and grand persona could go a miss.

This unforeseen event set everything back by a couple of hours and had me a little ‘pissed off’ as it was eating into my afternoon break. Time where I planned to curl up behind a little Indian man and lose a couple hours snoring in his ear. Sure enough though, the big Spuhn (no pun intended) appeared, and as soon as I saw Torstens friendly face apologize and explain that he was upstairs in his room preparing and polishing his equipments, Ja, I instantly forgave him and realized that sleep was just not necessary this week.

This man worked so hard, the previous day he told me he had been awake until 5:30am, most nights, rehearsing, preparing his ingredients and “polishing his equipment”. Hats off to Torsten.

Into the evening, the captains along with other World Class Ambassadors were to host 4 separate parties around town seeing busloads of invited guests experience and taste the different offerings of each destination. In the lead up to this event I had trained a couple venues bartenders in making the drinks and was looking forward to seeing all the familiar faces from the competition come through and sample the tipples.

Unfortunately though, there was a bit of danger surrounding the event after news of explosions in Mumbai had come to our knowledge. The night was called off and we were to return to the safety of the Imperial Hotel. A bit of a shame, but I didn’t really fancy hearing any bad news or having that kind of a stigma attached to such a wonderful event.

Unnecessary comments/jokes about my height tally: 23, a big day. Lots of the Asia Pacific supporters through my bar though. Oooh Rusty, you so big…Ahem.

Day 5 Last day of Competition and Awards Ceremony.

So, the final day, just the morning session of challenges before large amounts of celebration for one and all. This was also my chance to have a couple Australian lads through my Bar, Ryan Norieks (China rep) and Tim Phillips (Australian rep and fellow barlifeUK blogger) Unfortunately I know very little of the Australian Bar scene, but both of these guys came to my knowledge with a reputation of being great bartenders and all round good guys. This was more than true of the pair.

In fact Tim Philips and I shared a most memorable VB together the night before the competition got underway. During the challenge, I was blown away by Ryan’s absinth, kaffir lime, mint and lemongrass fog that he produced for one of his drinks. Something I’m sure it would take most bartenders a good week to think of and Ryan pulled it out the bag within a mere fraction of that time. Tim dazzled me with his drink prepared over naked flame.

I stood beside armed with fire extinguisher, secretly hoping something would go wrong so I could unleash the pressurized contents of the red can. However, his was Tim Phillips, nothing was going to go wrong. A slick presentation, definitely the most confident and full delivery in explanation of the flavours and beverages he chose to pair with the foods. Tim deserved to have the tag ‘red hot favourite’ from what I witnessed.

So, challenges were done, the last thing to do was a blind tasting by all contestants on a spirit of their choice. The task was to distinguish a reserve brand from an inferior competitors and a ‘super market’ brand. A swift exercise for most, made easy by the fact that the ‘supermarket’ stuff here in India is as easy to separate from the bunch as we used to do on playschool. Sing it, “one of these thing is not like the others, one of these things is not the same”

So with a small break before the evenings fare, Adi Ruiz and I escaped to his hotel room. No. Not to spoon. But for a gorge on some of the cured meat Torsten Spuhn had given me earlier that day. Amazing!

Returning to the Pavilion, the captains gathered for one last push from behind the bar. Adi was paired with Angus Winchester, pushing Juniper delights from his bar, the lucky git, while other individual bars around the pavilion, previously used for challenges were adorned with reserve brands. My bar housed the Zacapa 23 and XO, another saw Antonio Lai concocting signature serves with Ketel One.

We also had a Malt Bar, A Johnnie Walker bar and another one, meh. We also had the main bar pushing Ciroc deliciousness and Johnnie Walker Blue Label sublime. Before this got into full swing though, we were blessed to be present at the announcement of the Global Finalist Winner. This gave bragging rights to the one bartender that put in all those months of preparation, dazzled the judges and gradually edged out his rivals as the weeks challenges were met.

From the dazzling pavilion the 32 finalists were snaked around the stunning hotel grounds, guided by elephants, gorgeous saree’d ladies and the loudest traditional Indian band I have ever heard, to one of the grand banquet rooms to find out who was to be this years winner.

We were welcomed by Dr. Spike Marchant, dressed in a traditional Indian, collarless suit. He created a warm ambience in the room, while giving the crowd a well-rounded commentary of the week that was, and a Dr. Evil impression that will stay with me for a very long time to come. I had my fingers crossed that he’d give the particular line from Austin Powers 2, when Bob Nolet came on stage “how ‘bout no! ya crazy Dutch…” Unsurprisingly, that joke went begging.

The first of the accolades to be handed out were the winners of the individual challenges. Our boy, Mr. India, Hemant Pathak, took out the Vintage, Challenge Twist round, not an easy round to win with the cocktail genius that was shared by the 32 competitors.

We had been working with Hemant in the lead-up to the event and this was a well-deserved prize for the lad, who isn’t even old enough to drink in the city of Delhi yet. Haha.  A few times, whilst working with him at The Blue Bar in the Taj Palace hotel, I caught him slumped in a chair, recipe sheets in hand, snoring his little face off. Bless the little man, all that work paid off Hemant. Great job, my dear friend! And yes, a few tears were shed. Not me though, too tough for that carry on.

The other 5 challenge winners were named, some of the most notable favourites of the week, stepped up and took the floral garlands from the saree’d beauties. Then we were to find out the 3 regional winners from the week, they were as follows.

• Asia Pacific: Manabu Ohtake
• Europe and the Middle East: Heinz Kaiser
• Latin America and the Caribbean: Jesus Cabrera

These announcements sent everyone into a tizz, who was going to be the champ? If these names were regional winners, can they be overall winners? Tim Philips, for sure. Nope, Jamie Mac, deff. The atmosphere was electric.

And so the time had come to crown the new champion, the man, or woman, that could say that he was the best Bartender after a week long competition, being judged by the worlds most expert authorities on cocktails and come through the other side, scoring higher and more consistently than the 31 other competitors.

Drums were rolling, kind of, and the winner was named. The 2011 winner of the Diageo World Class Cocktail competition was…Manabu Ohtake from Japan! A worthy winner whose hand was swift and elegant and whose presentation of cocktail and self was exceptional. Manabu threw his arms up in excitement at the call and embraced 31 hugs, kisses and blessings. The boy was beside himself as Erik walked him to “The Chair” to sit as the World’s Best.

Manabu put his gracious self aside, as did Ueno san, who set Manabu atop his shoulders, I’m not sure how he managed it, but all 4’10” of him did. What a moment. I stood and observed from the back of the room, countries embraced, tears flowed and dreams were realized. At that moment I felt truly blessed to have been involved in such a brilliant spectacle, witnessing the toil that made it all possible and the emotion shared by every competitor, organizer, guru, chef and invitee.

This was our industry at her finest. I bathed myself in the atmosphere for just a moment more before Tim E Judge, Amanda, Angus, Rohan Adi and I ran to face the onslaught of celebration. We celebrated by welcoming competitors onto our respective bars to make drinks and ease the load. Funny though, the bartenders we allowed behind the bar, just drank the Johnnie Blue. Dry.

So, that was my week. A fantastic 5 days and a truly unforgettable time. People, thanked myself and the other captains for the work that was done throughout the week, however, I don’t feel like I work a single minute. I was so fortunate to be involved and I hope that I can be again. Thanks to one and all and congratulations go to all of the 32 competitors who represented themselves and their countries proudly.

Namaste!

Myself and the other Diageo Bar Academy trainers have been continuing to move through major Indian cities including Chennai, Kolkata, Mumbai, Jaipur, Goa and lastly Delhi.

And it’s here, in Delhi where we will wrap up the initial foundation part of our training. Then we move into preparations for this year’s Diageo World Class Competition.

This will be my first involvement of any kind with the internationally renowned contest and I’m bloody, bloody (more emphasis on the second) excited, let me tell you!!

Bangalore

Writing this from weeks after my time spent there, I can honestly say that Bangalore is seriously missed. It was there we were able to stretch our legs for a couple weeks and I was given time to explore this wonderful country and all she had to offer, for the first time.

It was Rohan Carvalho, India’s most charismatic export and I, who were stationed in Bangalore to deliver 2 weeks of Diageo Bar Academy training. There, we were given a great welcome and the satisfaction of full classrooms for all of the 8 sessions we delivered. Rohan assured me that the reason for the excellent turn-outs was simple.

Word must have spread around Bangalore, that it was he, the famed Mr. Carvalho delivering the education. I’d have to agree though, there were a few doe-eyed female students fumbling about during that 2 weeks. It’s easy to see why too, Rohan has a unique sense of humour, which suits me, as mine has been described as unique also. Although, more “unique” words have been used in the description.

Rohan and I also found we both have similarly wide tastes in music and in exploring each others tastes, we were able to uncover a few guilty musical pleasures to further our friendship. I will bravely say this though; it’s a special moment in a friendship when two grown men can admit to each other that Madonna’s Immaculate Collection, is one of the greatest albums ever produced.

During our time in Bangalore, Rohan and I had the privilege of visiting Amrut Distilleries, producers of many fine Whiskies and other spirituous liquors. Amrut Fusion is such a product and has been voted 3^rd in Jim Murray’s Whisky Bible of 2010.

Fusion is a single malt whisky comprising of two types of barley, one Indian and the other, a peated Scottish barley. The two malted barleys are distilled and aged individually, later blended and given a final lay down in American oak casks.

The whisky is aged only 4-6 years in the Indian heat. A good job too, as they loose on average 12% of the barrels contents every 12 months to the ‘Angels Share’. The two of us were given a very full and privileged tour of the operation, which boasts it’s own bottling plant, cooperage, distilling plant and, of course, monkeys in their dozens.

Those cheeky little b*st*rds, stroll through the place without a single care. In and out of the distilling rooms and whisky stores, as if they were part of the Amrut work force. After watching the “monkey business” I began to question the angels share calculation.

Only moments later, as if to affirm my queries, I saw a couple of monkeys making hand gestures at passing delivery trucks and whistling at   the female workers returning from their lunch break. Those b*st*rds.

Seeing this unique distillery in action was certainly a wonderful experience and I want to say a massive thank you to Tim Etherington-Judge for orchestrating the day, Vikas Arora for his warm hospitality and mellow presence throughout the entire day.

And lastly, but not leastly, to Amrut’s VP of production Surrinder Kumar, who gave one of the most passionate and fevered speeches about Whisky, in particular Amrut Whisky, I have ever had the pleasure of hearing.

A few days after visiting Amrut, Vikas gave us further display of Indian hospitality by hand delivering two bottles of Fusion juice to one of the Diageo Academy Classes.

I’m sure most from the industry have managed to sample one, hopefully two of the Amrut products, but please, please (more emphasis on the second) do yourself a favour and get your hands, large or small on a bottle. It’s delicious from start to finish and so truly unique. I can honestly say that the bottle is full of research, daring, passion and good old-fashioned balls. Not in the literal sense, of course.

Bangalore, as I said, is a place that I will truly miss, 2 brief weeks there wasn’t nearly enough. The Indian Premier League was in full swing with Bangalore seeing their way into the final, just weeks after I saw Tendulkar LBW for a duck. Who else saw this?  My accommodation was smack bang in the middle of the most interesting suburb I’ve ever spent time in. The good people there loved seeing me on my evening runs, cheering at my passing.

Me in my bright canary yellow asics trainers flashing past, weaving around 6 foot deep holes in the ground and dodging cows, it was some exhilarating exercise. Made more interesting when the sun had completely set. Also, somewhere in the middle of those couple weeks, I had a chance meeting with a fellow Manchester resident who worked in a bright and spanky little bar around the corner from the infamous Socio Rehab where I spent many lucid evenings. Eva* had been living in Bangalore for 10 months previous and was able to give me an experienced tour of the city over my last 7 days.

It was wonderful being around a familiar face and having a graceful hand guiding me through the haphazard surrounds of Bangalore. While my review of Bangalore will always be gleaming, Eva and Rohan really made it for me. I thank you both, along with the Amrut chaps and all the Academy graduates.

Delhi

It…is…so…f*cking hot here!!

Startending

Throughout our time here training here in India, we’ve also been assigned the task of promoting the World Class through leading bars in the cities we’ve visited. This has been an interesting venture, which has enabled me to get behind the mahogany at some of the most beautiful bars that India has to offer.

Furthermore we are shown the kind of hospitality we are here to dispel though the Academy. We’ve been working with previously devised World Class Menus, featuring creations for Reserve Ambassador Tim E-Judge as well as the 2011 Indian representative for Diageo World Class, Hemant Pathak.

This kid will be one to watch come finals time as he has a very forward thinking method when it comes to drink creation and working next to him, I can say he’s as fast as lightning, but unfortunately his smile is too damn to make him frightening.

The first major “startending” shift was at The Taj Palace’s Blue Bar with last year’s Australian World Class rep, Adam Brewer, Tim E-J and myself. I was anticipating the evening for a good few days previous, and it didn’t fail to deliver.

The first drink ordered was a Negroni, which set me thinking. The 3 of us all got on well in the bar environment, just like the 3 ingredients of a Negroni. You had Adam, the Vermouth, sweet, gaining complexity every time you cared to explore. Tim was the Campari, a different experience every time, converted vegetarian and most definitely bitter. And me…I was the Gin, fresh and aromatic with pronounced notes of citrus zest.

Just for the record Tom “The Doctor” Sneesby, the fasian ratings at these venues have generally been 5 out of 5 stars.

World Class lead-up

So now, we see ourselves within 2 weeks of the famed Diageo World Class finals here in Delhi. Adam, Tim and myself have been producing bespoke ingredients as substitutes for hard to find liquors here in India. And we’ve created a few worthy of bottling….sorry. The majority, have been the brainchild of Tim with some fine tuning done on the spot by all three of us.

During these few sessions Adam Brewer who, I will say, is below the legal drinking age here in Delhi, has blown me away with the maturity of his palate. He can give a full-blown appraisal of what is experienced and what is needed to help our bespoke products shine before setting down for this years competitors. A master of taste and aroma, and has only had his nose broken 3 times.

I aim to be giving a mostly detailed wrap up of the World Class Competition for the next blog from my cabana in Sri Lanka between surfing sessions. For now, though the countdown continues. Who will take the crown from last years Erik Lorincz and be heralded as the Best Bartender… in the Galaxy?!?!?!

*some names in the above article have been changed to protect the identity of the actual people. But mostly because Gemma asked me to.

David Gest - just one of the celebrities who attended Timothy's leaving do...

Some of you may have heard that I recently took a training position with global spirits giant Diageo in a new training drive by the company.

Myself and 10 other Bar Professionals have taken the roles with “The Big D” and we’re currently spreading our knowledge, experience and flavour throughout the Asia-Pacific, for the next few months and hopefully beyond.

The goal of the “Diageo Bar Academy” is to train and educate many hundreds of people new to our industry or bartenders that wish to further their knowledge and skills in this well rounded module of bar education.

Sunday the 25^th of April saw the 11 wide-eyed Diageo Academy Trainers arrive in Singapore to undertake a little training of our own. Also obtaining our advanced level of the WSET Spirit category under the wise and wonderful Mark Ridgwell from Taste and Flavour in Wimbledon.

If you ever have the pleasure of conversing on the topic of distilled spirits with Mark, you will cherish it dear. He is one of those characters whose passion and supreme wealth is evident in every single syllable. Mark will answer the most obscure and challenging questions thrown his way, like he’s seasoning his mashed potato.

I’m truly thankful to have had him share his wisdom and his time with us and I’m sure I speak for everybody in the group when I say this. During our time in Singapore, the good folk at Diageo were so very kind in putting us up at the stunning Carlton hotel. Some of us were even upgraded to the Premiere Suites, but whatever you do; don’t mention that to Spike Marchant.

So, 11 Bartenders in Singapore…lot’s of chat about bitters (yawn), bar spoons (yawn) and dilution levels of shaken cocktails when shaking with a southpaw stance versus a regular James Meehan foot position…(Zzzzzz).

More seriously though, the Diageo Trainers are an exceptional bunch of individuals, the Walking Whisky Library, Tim Etherington-Judge, the Australian World Class Champ Adam Brewer and China’s Answer to South Park Jackie Ho. That’s right, Jackie Ho. To mention just a few.

The week and a half was jam-packed with tuition, bar visits and a brief insight into Cocktail Architecture. Hmmmm.  Nevertheless, what happened on tour stays on tour. Right Adam?

Mumbai, India

Having been in India now for nearly a week at the time of writing, I have to say this is just one of the most awe-inspiring places I’ve visited in a long, long time.  Right from the start it’s been chaos of a most unusual fashion.

As my Indian colleagues and I walked out of the airport doors in Mumbai, we were greeted by a small ocean of faces, all smiling, all wobbling a little. The next thing that consumed me was the noise, car horns thundered through the warm night air relentlessly, and upon closer inspection it was apparent, that the horns were used in a pretty unnecessary way.

For example the blasts seemed to mean anything ranging from “hey, I’ve noticed you’ve stopped momentarily in front of me” to “check me out, I’m riding a motorbike today”. I think I heard more horns waiting for our driver in that 20 minutes, than I have in the last 5 years.

Next was the journey to the Bandra, slow moving to begin with as we were bottle necking through the airport exit which was 1 car and 1 motorbike wide. Just. This was fine, save for the fact that we were joined by 764,829 other cars and motorbikes. Needless to say the going was slow.

When we did eventually get into the smooth flowing traffic on the motorway I began to warm to the easy going nature of the Indian folk, red lights didn’t mean shit to anybody, the white lines painted on the road, well they didn’t serve purpose either. Life was easy here, rules were obeyed at random, but above all, everybody just understood the harmony that needed to be maintained.

So, easing up just a little, I turned to my pals in the back of the taxi van, made a small remark about something or other and then returned to face the road. I was then suddenly greeted with the silhouette of a young man in our headlights. My immediate reaction was to quite simply throw my hands over my eyes and wait for the impact. I’m glad to say that it never came. How not exactly, I’ll never be too sure. But this is India, so anything is possible.

Academy

At present, we’re a week into the Indian operation, and I can honestly say it’s proving to be a grand exercise. The 2 cities (Mumbai and Bangalore) we’ve tackled have given us a hugely warm welcome and loved the course detail, but above all have shown us a brand of hospitality that is nearly impossible to find in the western world. Especially when flying QANTAS. Wankers.

Currently I sit in an unopened 5* hotel in Bangalore penning this, well typing it, 1 day into the two day course, teaching another 20 eager pupils who love making cocktails and hang on every word. “Mr Tim Sir, who is the best Bartender?” “Tom Vernon” “Mr Tim Sir, what is the best cocktail?” “Anything Tom Vernon makes”

So please follow me on my journey through India which will see the first period culminate in Delhi, this years venue for the Diageo World Class. I’ll be less gay in the following blogs, as introductions are usually pretty crap. Aren’t they? I’ll be keeping a finger on the tuition pulse, posting bar reviews with unorthodox scoring systems, continuing on a quest to find the hottest flippin curry I can, and generally keeping you posted on the peculiarities of life on the sub-continent.

Worth mentioning I have a Whisky distillery tour lined up for Wednesday too. Stay tuned.